Who do I want to be?

The best place for me to start here is to summarise where I already am. I’ve got a Facebook, a twitter account (@yearingcat), a Tumblr, and this wordpress. I’ve also got a delicious account, instagram and a gravatar, but they’re definitely secondary.

So what do these say about me? If I look over my tumblr I’d think it says most about what ‘looks good’ to me. Simple that may be, it shows my visual lean and explores where I want to be. Images of New York, various actors, vintage motorbikes and the snow are definitely things that motivate me to work, live, and breathe.

So too, they represent a projected version of myself. I see these images and I think to myself that if someone was to look, they would be getting a relatively abstract, yet true, representation of me. Over analysis aside, it’s an insight into what I wish and want myself to be and as such it defines me.

This process is a very active one. Comparatively, I cannot remember the last time I posted a status on Facebook. I don’t feel motivated to. I don’t feel like reaching out to an audience. After all, the friends I want to see I see in person. And those I don’t probably wouldn’t care less if I posted a witty status into their news feed.

Where Facebook differs is its representation of me. Facebook allows others to create an image of me that may be true, may be false or might even be both. After all, a conversation on a wall post is seeable by all, so as much as you might be responding to your friend, you’re also performing for an audience and existing on their page as a part of them as much as a part of yourself.

I would make reference here to Jay Rosen:

“if all should speak, who should be left to listen?”

Indeed I ‘speak’ quite a lot about myself. Through images, through posts, through tweets. But where I would counter Rosen is in my ability to also listen to myself. To be reflective on what I post, and how I ‘speak’. Undoubtedly we are more active as online users, yet I also think we are more receptive as creators of our own image.

For this reason, I would hope to present myself in as many ways as possible. Through the online platform, I would hope to put forth that I am as much the person people know me for and I will attempt to add the colouring of how I know myself. If an audience should wish to ‘listen’ to me, they might find out something interesting they didn’t know. And if they are willing to ‘listen’, I’ll be all ears in return.

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